Sunday, January 22, 2006
"Anybody who doesn't like Oreo's isn't American"
So I'm cruising down the cookie aisle in yuppie, overpriced grocery store when I see a couple standing around, having what looks like a serious conversation. Looks like it's getting deep. Like earrings are about to come off and 911 is about to be called. They looked like they were on some Whitney and Bobby stuff, for real.
Apparently they were discussing what kind of cookie to buy for some event.
Suddenly, Yuppie Boy is like: "Anybody who doesn't like Oreo's isn't American."
He said this with confidence. As a statement of fact.
Well, my black ass must not be American, then, cause I can't STAND Oreo's.
They suck. They taste dirt mixed with icing. I've always hated Oreos. As a kid, whenever I encountered an Oreo, (I think my older sister liked them, and we would have them in the house every now and then) I would always break them apart, lick out all the icing, and toss them.
This reminds me of a conversation that me and Jemele had while in Vegas. I'm sick of people looking at me like I'm crazy because I don't like shrimp. I know it may seem "unamerican" or whatever, but I just don't like it. Just like I don't like Oreos.
And don't get me started on the negative connotation Oreo's have in black culture. As most of us know, a person who is considered a "sellout" is often called an Oreo: black on the outside, white on the inside. It's a slur. And it's one that's often unfairly used. It was used to run my boy Dennis Archer out of Detroit when he was trying to turn that jacked up city around.
Not that there aren't clueless negros out there - Clarence Thomas, please stand up - but calling someone "white" on the inside is ridiculous, un-measurable and qualifies a human beings values (i.e. "white" values versus "black" values). There are no white or black values. We're individuals.
Anyway, back at yuppie overpriced grocery store, apparently Yuppie Girl was trying to convince Yuppie Boy to get a more "adult" cookie.
"Well, maybe we should get a cookie that wasn't made for 14-year-olds."
I'm with Yuppie Girl: grown people should not be eating Oreos.
Unless you're Clarence Thomas.